What Your RA Says: Beginning of the Year Versus End of the Year

I was an RA for two years and worked at the residence halls for three. Many of my friends are also RAs and are still RAs. From early morning lockouts to late night duty shifts, my RA friends and I have said many things, but our meaning did not always match our words. Sometimes the meaning will change depending on the time of day. The meaning of "Can I help you?" changes dramatically as the school year progresses from beginning of the year (BOTY) to end of the year (EOTY). Here are a sampling:

Can I help you?

BOTY: I'm here to help with all of your problems and answer any questions and I'm just so excited to be here and I really hope I can be of assistance.

EOTY: I'm just going to point to where you need to go or have you speak to someone else.

I hope you'll come to the program this Thursday.

BOTY: I put so much time and effort in planning and organizing this, so if you don't show up, I'm going to take it personally.

EOTY: I know you're not going to come, but there will be free food anyways so that I don't have to eat the dorm food.

I don't care if you drink alcohol, just don't drink in the dorms.

BOTY: Guys, I want you to think I'm cool and on your side. College is a new experience, and I know you're going to experiment, but if I'm definitely going to make you pour out that unopened bottle of Maker's Mark.

EOTY: I'm going to ignore everything I hear coming from your room to the greatest extent that I can.

Feel free to knock on my door.

BOTY: Come in anytime. We'll talk, hangout, or discuss anything you want. I'm here for you.

EOTY: Feel free to knock on my door, because I won't be in there anyways. Sucker.

I'm going to need to see your ID.

BOTY: I'm so disappointed in you. I really hope you learn from this.

EOTY: Awesome. Now I have to write paperwork. You're on my list.

Hi, (insert name).

BOTY: Hi, person whose name I can remember, thank goodness, or else this would have been awkward.

EOTY: Hi, person whose name I know, because you are either always receiving mail or getting in trouble or are my favorite resident.

Do you want some free pizza?

BOTY: I want you to like me!

EOTY: I want you to like me!